This week's Quotable Queen is Jean Bidstrup: a Mother, Christian and Wise Senior Citizen. The following is her story presented with advice on improving mental health and anxiety.
When I was approached to be showcased as a Quotable Queen, my first instinct was, no. However, after reconsidering it, I decided that "Queen" sounded exciting, so I wanted to share my journey with you.
I always begin my day sitting at the edge of my bed for a few minutes (like all of us seniors do), asking God to be with me and keep me heathy and happy. My biggest challenge in life was raising a son with mental disabilities, which manifested into severe anxiety attacks. I knew I was at a crossroads and needed help. So, I sought guidance through a support group that helped individuals and families in similar situations as mine, and I thank God for them everyday.
It was through that support group where I learned how to deal with my insecurities and also learned strategies for restructuring my negative thinking. They helped me better understand how my perceptions and insecurities are not always reality. I learned I was striving for perfection out of fear of becomming average. My perfectionism surfaced through having an immaculately clean home to include my three little boys who were always perfectly dressed and well mannered. When I look back on those days, I realize I was wanting something that wasn’t attainable.
Group therapy helped me better understand that my mental health was at stake and that changing my thinking and priorities were going to be very important. I also had to learn to accept criticism from others and not take every comment someone said to me to heart. I’ve learned that when people lash out at you, your response does not have to be through anger. Instead, we should accept that we all have different viewpoints and that it’s okay to disagree.
“People start to heal the moment they feel heard.” - Cheryl Richardson
Perfectionism is what fuels anxiety, so it was important for me to be less critical of myself and others. But, this was not an easy task. I always felt insecure with my decision making and that my feelings weren’t valid. I suppose I just didn’t feel heard. However, through the years, I have consciously worked on a new way of thinking which has given me a more positive outlook on life and lessened my anxiety.
My advice to you is this - as you begin each new day, ask God not only to help you be patient and loving with others but also with yourself. A healthy, positive attitude is key to your health, and I believe that prayer in general should be part of your daily practice as it is the key to happiness!
Pray,
Dear God,
From the bottom of my heart,
I want to Thank You for loving me, forgiving me, and never leaving me.
Amen
Blessings to all!
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